Stella's Photoshoot
I will never forget this experience.
I was at the queen’s official photoshoot! There I was able to express myself and look at all the work I had done the past three years. Many wonderful stories were made with dancing, laughter, and of course the people surrounding me; but what I want to share with you all is the story behind my platform photos.
Leading up to this day, I researched so many photographs that showed types of abuse, mistreatment, and painful silence. I was so impacted by each photograph that I knew I had to do something similar. I decided that I want the lies I was told to be imprinted on me. I wanted to see what I have broken through. I needed to show what the impacts of bullying truly do to someone.
It was a group effort and I could not have done it alone. After some of the most freeing hours of my life, dancing in front of a camera, comfortable in my body...There I was again, tangled in the lies.
When I came down, Miss Jenna first wrote empowering words on my hands, “I AM ENOUGH”. During this I became strong, but only to be broken in the next few minutes.
I sat back down and watched how each letter placed on me. With each stroke I saw, I began to feel a chain link. Before I knew it, I was covered with words that I have not believed in a long time such as weak, empty, and worthless.
I stood up and felt unsteady in the knees. I walked over and we started shooting. My mom stayed around the corner.
I don’t remember when the tears began. I felt like I was in the eye of a hurricane, in the silent storm. I walked away to the bathroom and looked myself right in the eye and thoughts rushed. I realized what I had conquered and what I had lost. I am stronger now, but that doesn’t change the fact that at some point in time I wore this.
After looking in that mirror, I rushed back out. I asked if I could use a mirror to capture the moments that had just happened. Even though people surrounded me holding lights and mirrors, I felt alone. I also saw someone who had achieved using her story for good. I saw the crown. No, not the title’s crown, but God’s crown of love. He washed each word off. I knew where my identity was in Him.
He calls not just me but you as well. God is reaching out wanting to make you a new creation. Answer Him.
Finding the Gold,
Stella
I was at the queen’s official photoshoot! There I was able to express myself and look at all the work I had done the past three years. Many wonderful stories were made with dancing, laughter, and of course the people surrounding me; but what I want to share with you all is the story behind my platform photos.
Leading up to this day, I researched so many photographs that showed types of abuse, mistreatment, and painful silence. I was so impacted by each photograph that I knew I had to do something similar. I decided that I want the lies I was told to be imprinted on me. I wanted to see what I have broken through. I needed to show what the impacts of bullying truly do to someone.
It was a group effort and I could not have done it alone. After some of the most freeing hours of my life, dancing in front of a camera, comfortable in my body...There I was again, tangled in the lies.
When I came down, Miss Jenna first wrote empowering words on my hands, “I AM ENOUGH”. During this I became strong, but only to be broken in the next few minutes.
I sat back down and watched how each letter placed on me. With each stroke I saw, I began to feel a chain link. Before I knew it, I was covered with words that I have not believed in a long time such as weak, empty, and worthless.
I stood up and felt unsteady in the knees. I walked over and we started shooting. My mom stayed around the corner.
I don’t remember when the tears began. I felt like I was in the eye of a hurricane, in the silent storm. I walked away to the bathroom and looked myself right in the eye and thoughts rushed. I realized what I had conquered and what I had lost. I am stronger now, but that doesn’t change the fact that at some point in time I wore this.
After looking in that mirror, I rushed back out. I asked if I could use a mirror to capture the moments that had just happened. Even though people surrounded me holding lights and mirrors, I felt alone. I also saw someone who had achieved using her story for good. I saw the crown. No, not the title’s crown, but God’s crown of love. He washed each word off. I knew where my identity was in Him.
He calls not just me but you as well. God is reaching out wanting to make you a new creation. Answer Him.
Finding the Gold,
Stella
